哪位大神帮我看看我写的这篇英语短文有没有语法或者哪方面的错误 帮着纠正一下

哪位大神帮我看看我写的这篇英语短文有没有语法或者哪方面的错误 帮着纠正一下
为了达到节省成本的目的选择了在一些劳动力成本较低的国家进行产品的加工制造
例如他选择了在中国的富士康进行加工制造
在销售地区多选择饥饿式营销等手段以达到产品价格的稳定甚至价格上涨
In order toachieve
the purpose of cost saving choice in some countries with low labor costs of
processing and manufacturing of the products
For example he chose foxconn for processing and
manufacturing inChina
Choice hunger marketing in the sales region,in order to
achieve stable product prices even higher prices
苹果所制造的产品风靡全球,苹果成为全球市值最高的上市公司,2011年公司利润高达259亿美元,持有现金及有价证券810亿美元,超过美国国库.
但对于另一些人来说,苹果可能配不上“伟大”二字,和许多曾经为科技创新做出卓越贡献的企业一样,在社会责任履行上,却不完满.
Apple made products
popular all over the world,become the world's most valuable listed company,
company profits as much as $25.9 billion in 2011,$81 billion in cash and
marketable securities,and more than United States Treasury.
But for others,apple may not deserve the word
"great",and many have made outstanding contributions for science and
technology innovation of enterprises,on the social responsibility to fulfill,
but did not complete.
苹果公司在中国对中国消费者的售后服务远不如在外国例如说手机出了问题可以享受整机更换服务 然而却并没有在中国实现这些中国相关监督组织要求苹果公司道歉并且提高售后服务质量以达到让中国顾客满意
Apple after-sales service for Chinese consumers in
China than in foreign such as mobile phones out of the question can enjoy
service the replacement,however,did not achieve these China related
supervision organizations in China demanded an apology from apple and improving
the service quality in order to let the Chinese customers

你的问题主要是对语法理解比较显浅,例如整个句子都没有主语,句子前后主语变换还有介词完全乱用等.以下面一句为例
In order to achieve the purpose of costsaving choice in some countries with low labor costs of
processing and manufacturing of the products.
可较为准确的翻译为
In order to achieve the purpose of cost-saving,PEOPLE/Firms chose to process and manufacture products in some low labor cost countries.
添加主语"人们“,句子尽量少用介词短语,少用少错,不用不错.其他的句子问题大概都是这样,不一一细说了,你可以用机译稍稍了解一下